Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Happy Valentine's Day

Crazy Train (of thought)

Accidents happen, and one happened over the weekend on Vice President Cheney’s hunting trip. I’ve heard some call for his resignation. Absurd? Absolutely.

The White House press corp has their panties in a bunch over nothing. I hate seeing adults stomping their feet in child-like tantrums.

I understand why we have hair in our ears and nostrils, but I don’t understand why it grows so vigorously. Furthermore, I can’t understand how some men can look at themselves in the mirror and not see these bushes growing out of their orifices.

Why do some drivers act as if they own the lane they are driving in, and refuse to move over to make way for a merging car? And I hate those people who can’t make a 90 degree turn and stay in their lane. Do they not understand what those wide painted stripes are for?

I saw a Volvo wagon with spinning hubcaps this morning. Now that was money well spent on bling bling.

Marital Bliss

Happy Valentine’s Day, Jill, my sweet and beautiful wife. With you in my life, every day is filled with love and celebration. I have never been happier than I have since finding you!

Kid-bytes

We told Linley she could pick the restaurant tonight for our Valentine’s dinner. She wants to have Chinese food. She could eat Chinese food for every meal, and it would always be the same order, wonton soup. Get this, she takes the wontons out of the soup and then drinks the broth. Would she just eat a bowl of chicken broth from a can? No, it doesn’t have any wontons in it.

Today’s Rant

My wise wife has advised me to be less political in my rants. She has always been excellent counsel, so I will continue to heed her advice. No more about taxes or other maters that can be polarizing. I hope I have not caused anyone great offense. Now, on to the rant…

I am self-employed, therefore I have no matching employer contributions to my payroll tax obligations. I have to pay the full 100%. It hurts like hell to write those checks. What is most painful is having to pay the unemployment tax. Unemployment tax! I am my company’s only employee. If I fired myself, could I file for unemployment compensation? Hardly, but I must pay the tax!

Book Report

It’s Valentine’s Day, the celebration of romance. My book, “Why I Love You: 100 Reasons,” is a perfect gift for someone special in your life, today or any day. While in Target yesterday buying candy for Linley to take to school, I saw customers with this book in the check-out line. It’s cool to think that today someone is reading my book and understanding how much they are loved. Here’s a sample:

I love you because…

I can feel your heart when you touch me.
You kiss me like you mean it.
You try to seduce me when you think no one is watching.
When I reach for you, you move closer.
You don’t demand more of me than I can give you.
Even though time has changed me, you still find me attractive.
You still chase me around the house.
When your arms fold around me, all my worries disappear.
You indulge my romantic impulses.
You still treat me like you did when we were first dating.

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